I’m getting on a plane motherfu*kers

There is 30’s swing playing in the next room right now.  There are three people around me who a week ago I did not know.  I am in a new house; a new room.  I have packed and unpacked everything I own.  I now have four flatmates as opposed to one.  I walk a different route home.  And I have said goodbye to what housed my last year.

After packing and unpacking, I have packed again, only on a far smaller scale.  I have skin that has been tanned by a spray.  My toenails match my fingernails.  I have seen the last of my office for the next 19 days.  I have saved all my good underwear.  And I am indeed on the cusp of holiday. 

Bali and Thailand baby.  Bali and fucking Thailand.  10 days with delightful friends in Bali celebrating a fabulous lady’s impending 30^th, followed by a visit to a love of mine in Chiang Mai with a brief liaison with the sister and brother-in-law in Bangkok.  Hello.  Could life be sweeter?  Oh yes it could.   Let’s add the warm-weather-reliability factor.  I’m having difficulty convincing myself that I don’t need to pack a bag of sweaters.  My mind can’t compute.  Summer in this country is not absent of a need for stockings and sweaters, but supposedly, the land of the Thai and the Balinese find these items in their unnecessary piles, or perhaps don’t find them at all.

I have BIG plans for this holiday.  Big.  In Bali I plan to sleep, read, drink, attend yoga, have many a massage, troll the markets, swim, be generally warm, and most importantly, laugh my freaking ass off.  This final point I am guaranteed of, for the mix of people I am going to travel with never seem to disappoint me on that front.  I think we are a sitcom waiting to happen.    

Then Thailand.  Realistically what is going to happen there is that I will chatter till my voice box and lungs go on strike.  I mean it, like proper strike with pickets and signs and slogans and general masterful protesting.  For I plan on chattering, nattering, squealing, yelling and laughing at various quantities within the albeit too brief time I will spend with my friend Pash who lives in Chiang Mai.

THEN (as if things couldn’t get any better) I get to spend one magical day in Bangkok with the two most precious people known to my existence.  I am not sure what we will do but I doubt we will sleep.  At least I certainly won’t.  I’ve missed them too desperately for the past six months as they have been travelling the world, so I will probably resort to watching them sleep and sniffing them occasionally so I can absorb their presence back into my bones.

This holiday honestly could not have come at a better time.  Almost as if it weren’t on the horizon my body might have given up some time ago.  I guess I feel just a bit burnt out (as you would have probably gauged from my last post).  I’ve been in survival mode a bit; a bit just make it to the holiday Rhiain.  I’ve actually only just realised how much this is true for I have barely made any plans post-holiday.  For the first time in ages it feels like a bit of space might be allowed into my life, for the lack of post-holiday plans actually means I haven’t crammed my life full of too much stuff like I usually do.  This is not to say I won’t yet do that.  I can only promise myself so much.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes the anticipation of things is almost better than the thing.  Like waiting for this holiday has been such a drawn out and stretched process but the anticipation has been heartbreakingly fantastic; waves of joy and excitement have smacked my face and washed over my body every now and then for the past, well, two years.  Yeah.  Two years.  I’m pretty sure it was my friend’s 28^th birthday when she tabled this idea initially.  But sometimes being on this side of the adventure is more fun, for on the other side it is simply over.  I know that is a slightly fatalistic outlook, but it is my general outlook nonetheless.  So for this holiday my biggest goal is to be in the moment.  Breathe it in.  Experience it.  Not rush through the good parts with premature sadness of their impending end, but appreciate what time I have and that I have it as opposed to not.  Knowing me I will not achieve this goal entirely, but heck, I am going to try my darnedest. 

What I will say though is that whilst I have barely any “plans” post-holiday at the moment, I do plan on devoting a load of time to thinking on this trip.  I am hoping to get the creative juices flowing and begin crafting some new lyrics and new songs and new ideas, so keeps your eyes peeled and your ears open. Now, I will hopefully update you all from Bali with some glorious photos of sun and beaches or stories of happy happenings, but until then…love to you all.